This blog is about living the American Dream at the dawn of the new millennium! I am a nameless, mid-20s, bottom 150 Law School Graduate who finds himself marginally attached and awash in a sea of overeducated but underpaid, indentured peers who feel, and were, duped by the promise of a better life through debt and modern chemistry. Let's get to the point. The Law School Industrial Complex is a scam that has destroyed a generation out of greed. Vendettas were once legal and the pursuit of one was seen not only as moral, but necessary. This newly minted lawyer is going to continue the practice. DON'T GO TO LAW SCHOOL YOU MORONS! Ce qui suit est ce qui reste!

Sunday, April 29, 2012

End of the Beginning: Law School Dean Admits Scam

Well that only took two freaking years.  No really, it's been just about two years since I joined the fray.  Happy anniversary!  In that time things have really only gotten worse for the law school grads.  The scam is becoming kitchen table conversation and the ultimate victims are now going to become bargaining chips for the upcoming election.  Funny how that seems to happen.  Realistic translations of recent headlines assemble!

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First, if your ridiculously old ass wants the privilege of attending law school you're going to have to pony up more dough than when they could rake a higher volume of idiots.  You know, the same group of people that thought flea circuses were real, the Bible is literal truth, and we invaded Iraq on just pretenses (aka complete fucking morons).  It makes complete economic sense that fewer applicants means higher costs, but for you Zero Lemmings who are still intent on jumping off the cliff -- this just means you'll be throwing that much more money down the toilet.  But then again as so many of my compatriots say, I'm already at six figures who cares if I add a little more? This shit is for beyond your mortal life anyway.

Second, speaking now with an "expert" on bankruptcy and "ethics"...former "Dean," the reader may substitute the word dean here for the phrase "lying sack of quasi-criminal shit who got away with it and laughs about it all the way to the bank" as this phrase is the common tongue translation for dean.  So we're talking about Nancy B. Rapoport (the B stands for Bullshiter).

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Nancy Bullshit is here at some fucking useless conference in the most useless fucking city on God's green earth talking about the coming "possible" closure of "some" law schools.  That's not the actual question, the actual question posed is,

"Do you expect Congress to take action and amend the bankruptcy code at some point to make student debt dischargeable?"
God...no fuck it just watch the clip.



Point A, this whole interview is creepy as fuck.  They both start off with those fake camera smiles that makes them look like some kind of lobotomy patient who has a set of jingle bells dangled in front of them (also weird she's doing this interview in a body posture that looks like she is sitting on a broom--handle first).

Point B,  by "class" of law school students, Bullshiter meant to say "each and every single year of graduates" including the fucking President of the United States and not "class" as in a smaller subset of people.  Overall, she has this casual detached, I don't give a shit affect throughout the interview as if she is talking about wallpaper.  It doesn't even sound like she's talking about something she's passionate about...something you'd expect from an "expert" in something.  Well she's detached and disaffected for most of the interview...

But here comes my favorite part or as they say in poker, her Tell.  What's the old saying, if someone's lips are moving they are lying?

Notice the way that she smiles when she says the phrase, "They went into law school believing the statistics that their law schools posted..." at the 1:26 mark.  

If I've ever seen a self aware shit eating grin on a perpetrator's face it's right there.  That's the closest I've ever seen a dean actually admit they were in on the scam.  Not admit to the scam in Brian Tamanaha's hedging manner of "I have a concern about these numbers here I had better postulate and pontificate about it like the bloviating asshole of a professor I am rather than actually do anything about it."

Her body language gives it all away.  I've seen shopping mall elves lie to children better than this shameless bitch professor.
 
The students believed the statistics...Can you fucking believe that?  What kind of an asshole could have believed the shit we were shilling?

OH THAT'S RIGHT FUCKING EVERYONE BELIEVED THE STATISTICS!!!

YOU HELD THEM OUT AS FACTUAL FOR YEARS WITHOUT HAVING TO PROVIDE ANY EVIDENCE THAT YOU WEREN'T LYING THROUGH YOUR GOD DAMN TEETH!!!

GOD FORBID WE EXPECT DECENCY HONESTY AND INTEGRITY FROM A FUCKING INSTITUTION THAT BLABS ABOUT PROTECTING THE SAME FOR THE SOCIETY AS A WHOLE!!!  WHAT'S ANOTHER WORD FOR THIS OH RIGHT! ETHICS!!! MOTHERFUCKERS!!!

This is the Nixon/Frost moment for me...whereas Nixon at least had the balls to say "If the President does it then it's not a crime" Nancy Bullshiter is being tongue in cheek about the scam she benefited from for years.  Take a look kids, this is the closest you will ever see to someone ever admitting they knew what they were doing in the law school scam.

Notice the sharp intake of breath at 1:28 as she says "believing the statistics about most of our graduates get jobs and they find out low and behold even if it were true at the time it's not true now."  Fucking A.  Even if they were true at the time?!

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What the fuck?!  There's a fucking "reporter" right there and he didn't have the wherewithal to follow up on that statement? Are you fucking kidding me?!

 

Point C, Professor Brian Tamanaha---that crusading muckraker of a blogger who posted not 1 but 3, 3 whole tangential blogposts!!!! where he mentions what was going on in law schools--- and many other profiteers on the younger generation's misery have taken umbrage with my characterization of them as morally culpable, probably criminal Crypto-Nazis (to use Gore Vidal's words).  You know, shameless bags of shit.

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Quite frankly, he and the rest of the law school professors, deans and administrators who keep this shit going even as some now "criticize it" can go suck on the most Aids riddled gorilla dicks in the most remote parts of Subsaharan Africa until they literally bleed to death from their ears from crippling opportunity infections.  Words fail to describe the scenarios of my imagination.


Motherfuckers.


Nancy "Bullshit Streaming From My Pores" Rapawhore brings it back around with the astute observation "Not only can they not make their loan payments they can't make their rent." Then she slightly shrugs.

Time for her solutions.  The Northern Exposure plan? Really?  That's the best your "expert" mind can come up with?  Go out to "underserved" areas?  Fuck you bitch why don't you go out to the fucking Yukon and help people, you're the "expert" here.  I'm sure there are some moose hunters who would like to get their books in order.  I know let's wait for Congress! Good idea Nance!!  Like the companies that have a trillion dollars of money down on this scam will let Congress give people an out.  Did expert replace the word retard in our vernacular?

To close, she expects some schools will have to close but not the schools at the top top...you know the top of the heap, best of the best institutions like the William S. Boyd School of Law at the University of Nevada.  

William S. Boyd will still be bringing in the kids with the Buck Rogers, what the fuck did you just really use that phrase in a conversation, to keep going on as an elite place of learning.  This is the same city where there's a growing underground city of homeless, jobless people in a waterless desert and it happens to have the highest unemployment rate in the country.  But don't you worry when the real shit starts hitting the fan, William S. Boyd will come out on top top.  Who thinks Nancy will be around at Boyd and lose her job when that happens?

Place your bets here! Place your bets!

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Third and finally, speaking of shit hitting the fan.  What's that?!  A Law School in trouble?! They're having layoffs! They're having layoffs! They're having layoffs!!! (to be read very quickly with the tone of naner naner naner).

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What? They're firing the fucking janitors not the professors?! Son of a bitch.  Now here's where the rubber meets the road with Nancy Bullshit's prognostications.  Even if these pieces of shit who run rape mills where they destroy innocent victims futures with false promises are "negatively impacted by an unforeseen combination of marketing puffery regarding their graduates success and market economics thereby forced to right size," it won't be the professors that go first.  No no.  They'll make sure to get theirs first.  Rats always get off before passengers.

The disparity in pay at schools like Hastings between employees is ridiculous.  In the same way that 1 average American consumes the same amount of resources as about 25 Zimbabweans, 1 fired law school professor could cover, I'm guessing in the dark here, at least a couple of "staff" salaries.  But you have to protect the talent right?  Motherfuckers.

By the way, I've regularly interacted with a number of Hastings grads and I will say they're just like anyone else who goes to a school like that, pretentious douchebags.  Just kidding, not really, but I do know one kid from Hastings who sucks donkey balls as a human being.  Then again, law school isn't about making well rounded, morally upright human beings.  It's about raking in that loan money!!! Make it rain bitches!

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By the way if anyone has a problem with my sentiments, analysis or language at any point in this post, please see below.

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Till next time!!! GET ON YOUR HOLDEN CAUFIELD CAPS KIDS IT'S TIME TO WORK FOR THE UNDERSERVED, YOURSELF NOT INCLUDED!!!

4 comments:

  1. Indeed, "no one takes responsibililty", including the creator of this blog.

    His/her plight is everyone else's fault: "I'm a victim! I'm a victim! I'm a victim!"

    Thanks for the entertaining posts - they are hilarious!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh shit! I got served! That'll teach me to be accurate!

    As for entertaining you, you're welcome fuckwad!

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  3. The people who work for law schools know damn well that they are selling lies.

    To the anonymous poster above @April 29, 2012 5:43 PM, the point you are missing is this --

    She is admitting that at least some administrators know that there are not enough jobs for law grads in this country. In addition, she is also saying that the employment numbers schools post are likely misleading.

    After admitting this she offers a solution that really would not help the situation. There would still be an oversupply of lawyers and an under-supply of jobs. How many schools would she close, one, ten, one hundred, maybe two hundred?

    Finally, lets discuss your "taking responsibility" complaint. This blogger is doing what many young lawyers including myself do for people who want go be lawyers but have no clue. Warn them about the dangers the administration would like to hide from view.

    Someone needs to tell people that a lot of what schools say are lies, and that not everyone who becomes a lawyer or goes to law school gets rich. They need to know that public interest work may not pay off your loans, and private practice may not pay six figure salaries.

    If this blog saves some poor kid, parent, immigrant, etc. from making a monumental financial mistake the blogger saved someones future. That's not being a victim thats fighting to expose the flaws and lies hidden in the system.

    Have a nice day!
    SJB!

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  4. Demos, the trolls can no longer even come up with a tepid defense of this filthy, disgusting industry. Hell, now bar presidents, "professors" and major news organizations have ripped into the law school pigs.

    To the anonymous douchebag who posted on April 29, 2012, at 5:43 pm,

    I realize that Demosthenes already bitch-slapped you, with a jawbreaker. But I deal with mentally-challenged shills on my site, and I enjoy ripping into the cockroaches.

    The author of this blog has noted before that he or she runs the site to educate others. You do realize that the scambloggers have no money riding on this outcome, correct, bitch? Unlike the "professors," deans, and university administrators, we have no financial stake in the matter. If you want to attend TTTT Cooley, Third Tier Drake or the Lionel Hutz College of Law, then go ahead. It will not add one cent to my overall student debt.

    ReplyDelete